Flowers of love, tears of pain,
Life flashes again and again,
Pain and torture, lust and sin,
Death and destruction from within.
Who am I and where am I going?
Raindrops falling, kisses blowing,
Why all of the love going in the world,
And into a world of darkness I’m hurled.
I remember all the soft caresses,
Moonlit nights and pastel dresses.
Love’s warm and kiss and heartaches cold bite,
Crying myself to sleep at night.
Where are the flowers, do they still bloom?
Where is the love in this world of doom?
Talismans of hearts, candy of love,
Why did I lose the one sent from above?
The love so perfect, the love so real,
My heart was robbed, there was nothing to steal.
Robbed and shattered onto the floor,
In thousands of pieces maybe more.
Flowers of love, tears of pain,
It will never happen to me again.

A single song, a single kiss
Who would’ve thought that I’d have missed.
That single song that moved my heart,
That single kiss that tore me apart.
You never know how lonely it seems,
Till you stare at your shattered dreams.
The dreams you thought they would come true,
But deep inside you really knew.
There was no way for it to be,
There was no one that could foresee.
And as that life goes passing by,
You wave to it and slowly sigh.
Farewell my life, my love to be,
Farewell the dreams that could not be.
Farewell the song that stole my heart,
Farewell the kiss that tore me apart.
For I will make another start,
And I will make another heart.
For a new song, and a new kiss,
And hope it turns out better than this.

1989

She lay bereft of human feeling, deep inside the night,
Her heart lay broken, glittering shards, losing the fight.
Did he ever notice? Did he ever mourn?
Did he ever care for her? will he yet this morn?
Had not her eye cast upon, the ring as still she wept,
Then perhaps this tale could go on, but this is where she leapt.
The sorrow that collided, from this still ring of gold,
Was passed on undecided, to the next of kin and sold.
I have it here within my hand, the cause of her demise,
And i know that without me, her story would not rise.
So here’s to Love, oh parted one, here’s to blessings’ stage,
For once you had a heart, now you are words on a page.
9-27-2006

Sorrow makes my heart yearn to break,
How much longer will this shadow take?
This clown mask I wear is not to fool,
Just a gleam to make a hot day cool.
No tears are shed, the smile will stay,
How long til the shadow fades away?
The dream relived, the song resung,
Until the old has re-begun.
I wish to fly to distant skies,
But the shadow lays in lies.

Pretty makeup i do not wear,
My thoughts inside i do not share.
I dreamt a dream once upon a time,
But now the verse has lost it’s rhyme.
They used to touch my long flowing hair,
Used to long for my love filled stare.
And now vacancy has taken it’s place,
As i watch like a spectator while others race.
There once was a hand to reach out for mine,
To hold me close, and say you are mine.
Though now it has turned to meaningless lust,
A child’s game, do i run or trust?
I dreamt a dream once upon a time,
But now the verse has lost it’s rhyme.
12-1-2001

Once i was loved,
I felt hands of passion embracing my skin,
Once i was loved,
But I’ll not feel it again.
The warm winter’s night, now fades into grey,
As i walk alone, the night into day.
Once i was loved,
I heard soft words fill my ears,
Once i was loved,
I’ll not see it for years.
And the candlelight’s glow, slowly burns out,
Where once was joy, is now without.
Once i was loved,
I had attention and unbounding joy,
Once i was loved,
Now i am another tossed aside toy.
And the sun that burned brightly, has now gone past sundown,
And the place that we built is now all rundown.
Once i was loved,
And it withered away
Once i was loved,
It would never stay.
And the tears that once fell, from bitter stained cheeks,
Now lay dry as bone, for desolate weeks.
I have cried a river, I screamed out in pain,
I desired for much, and I stood in the rain.
I called and I sighed,
I withered and cried.
Once i was loved,
But that love has died.
4-6-01

There was never any reason,
The empty heart does not beat.
There is no pain where there is no Love.
Where once was a fool’s joy,
Now tears reside.
Why do you feel to feel only pain?
Was not ignorance bliss?
Why did you seek out emotions?
To feel..now how do you feel?
For not even loneliness hurts as bad as heartbreak.

2010?

There is no laughter in the hall,
There is no one I care to call.
You left me here all alone,
Knowing I’d be cold as stone.

The hell I raised, the life I lived,
Is gone now, just like I said.
Your good thoughts, and your good deeds,
Weren’t enough for all my needs.

I tried to fight a losing war,
Now it’s over, I am no more.
Wish you were here beside me,
That’s ok, it wasn’t meant to be.

My life’s so cold, as is my heart.
Shame it happened, I’m falling apart.
What can I do, what can I say,
It’ll return again someday.

And until then I think of you,
But it’s too late, nothing I can do.
When you return, I can not change,
It is so sad, I act so strange.

2/17/89

Why am I always alone, he turns away from me,
Why should I even try for what I long to be.
I had learned so much from the one before,
Does everyone think I can take much more?
No one can comprehend,
Why my life can not bend.
Hurt and frustration how long this time,
Til another heart ache I find,
Though they promise the world to me,
I’ll always know this can not be.
No one can comprehend,
How long it takes my heart to mend.
I long to cry to mourn my loss,
But it’s the way the coin is tossed.
It’s tossed the same all the time,
And yet tomorrow the sun will shine.
No one can comprehend,
Why do I even bother to try again.
I do not think I will go to another,
It stays the same I don’t need to bother.
I guess this is God’s will to be alone,
So I will sit and turn to stone.
No one can comprehend,
Why I call this life the end.

1989 maybe 96