Original X-roads-2003

    A slow breeze rushed over my body as Jonothan began to softly caress my face. It cooled my passion slightly, I pulled away from him quickly and looked the other way. “I can’t do this Jonothan.” more for my benefit than his.
    He reached and traced the outline of my face with his finger, “You mean you won’.” his words deep and soft.
    “Whatever.” I jerked away.
    “Who you thinkin of dat you can’t be wit me?” his words seductive and slow now.
    Small chills raced up and down my back, “I’m not thinking of anyone but myself.” I muttered. To think he could even think I was thinking of someone else. I rolled my eyes, did what I say make any sense at all?
    “Dat’s rite.” he whispered from behind. His finger moving slowly from my left shoulder to my right. “You keep yo’r mind elsewhere, try to think of somethin else while I stand here.” I could feel his warm breath on my neck, “An when you tired of dat, you try somethin else. But don thin’ cause you actin dis way mean dat you don wan me. I already know you do.”
    I jumped away from him, how can he know all this stuff about me? How did I get here, I mean with him, how could I have let myself get mixed up with him? I have better things to do, I know I do. Why aren’t I there? Why can’t he just let me be? He can’t possibly feel the same way I do, it’s inconceivable.
    “Why you keep pullin away from me?” he was at my back again. “I tol’ you already you got nothin to fear.”
    Oh those soft words, lulling me into a false security. “Why do you chase me so much?” it was all I could muster out, considering that he was quickly turning me into a helpless child.
    “Why you doubt me so much?” I felt him walk in front of me. “What you wan me to prove? Dat I love you? Dat I be wit you forever if you just gimme a chance? I can’t be wit you if you keep pushin me out gal. All I can do den is seduce you.”
    “That’s all you ever do anyway.” I muttered.
    “Dat’s all you let me do.” his words seemed slightly angered. “I wan you to lemme in, I wan to do a lot of thins you won lemme do. You move away, cast me aside, hide yo’r feelins, you buildn up a wall an you not gonna let no one thru ever. You don trust me, just like you don trust no one. Not even yo’rself.”
    I narrowed my eyes, figures, he would say something like that. I know the truth hurts, but really, does he have to do this to me?